enough despair and self-analysis

Looking for why I’ve been so easy to upset
So contingent on circumstances
So quick to despair
So entrenched in fruitless self-analysis,
Looking at myself and not finding answers.
But peace is in this:
To look outside and beyond myself,
To see One Who is greater
And learn that I am less-
That explains all, satisfies my heart.
Give me peace in humility, O God.

we’re picky because we’re hungry

From this week’s 850 Words of RELEVANT:

I believe our tendency is to come to the worship service spiritually starved. It would be ludicrous to imagine going one week without eating, and yet many of us go a whole week without reading the Bible and praying daily. When we fail to eat healthy spiritually speaking, no wonder it is easy to become edgy, irritable and critical when we finally get our hands on some spiritual food in a once-a-week worship service. Likewise, in this state of mind it’s much easier to slip into the framework of worshipping our worship, rather than worshipping God. (Kary Oberbrunner)

Wow. We’re critical because we’re consumers. My friend David has suggested that early-church services were more a matter of contributing things that people had learned throughout the week from personal study and prayer and experience (see 1 Cor 14:26). But we now run church like it’s the exclusive source of spiritual nourishment. Yes, I’m endorsing the much-criticized “quiet time” concept, which, while taken to legalistic extremes in some movements, is nonetheless essential to the Christian life. If this personal discipline is neglected, church becomes a feeding frenzy where we all push and throw elbows to get our way - music just right to get us in a “worshipful” mindset; sermon not too long but not too shallow, either; not too many announcements; good refreshments afterward, etc. Enough. Let’s go to church to give to others, to BE the church, not take. The “service” isn’t intended to be a service to us, after all.

I finished Spirit of the Disciplines. Great book; I’d go so far as to call it a must-read, and if you like it, go on to Willard’s sort-of-sequel The Divine Conspiracy.

Giving life

Ted Haggard has a book called The Life-Giving Church. This isn’t a book review, but I liked the concept he discusses of saying “yes” to people’s dreams and initiative, to being an enabler of good rather than one who restricts and shuts others down. I’ve heard this from other church leaders, like Rick Warren, and it seems to be a good leadership principle in general.

It’s certainly true in education. Rather than just letting kids do what they want, being life-giving invovles assuming the best, of giving attention to good things rather than bad. For example, I’ve found that, when I want to quiet a noisy class, it’s much more effective to pick up my Top Student Award pad (part of a little school token economy) than the infraction pad (for discipline). They just respond better. Sometimes they talk more because they’re excited about getting the rewards, but it’s worth it to be positive and life-giving and not always threatening them.

On another related note, I’ve been noticing that I do better as a teacher if I focus on the good kids - teaching for those who are interested and participating, not the few who aren’t. This is crucial but unnatural, because the bad kids act bad in order to get attention, and they’re good at it. It’s a tough but transforming process to so emphasize good that there is little room or reason for bad.

Willard and poverty

Surprisingly, toward the end of Spirit of the Disciplines, Willard takes a stand against the idea that poverty is spiritually desirable. He doesn’t go into a text-by-text refutation, but he shows in many ways how poverty is destructive to human life. Rather than give all away and seek to be poor, he says, we should seek to gain and control all we can under the reign of Christ. We care for it as part of our stewardship of the earth; giving it all away only allows others to rule the earth, and they will not do it on God’s terms. Willard is careful to point out the value of and the need for giving, but focuses much more on stewardship. He says we’ve failed to teach the rich an appropriate way to handle their wealth; we just tell them to give everything away, which misses the opportunity they have to excercise positive influence for good with their position.

specific useful spiritual disciplines

Toward the end of Spirit of the Disciplines, Willard lists some specific disciplines that he considers important:

Disciplines of Abstinence
-solitude
-silence
-fasting
-frugality
-chastity
-secrecy
-sacrifice’

Disciplines of Engagement
-study
-worship
-celebration
-service
-prayer
-fellowship
-confession
-submission

Most interesting are the links he makes between the disciplines, which I will not attempt to explain in detail. As an example, though, he points out that prayer requires time in solitude, and is often enhanced by fasting and study. They are all interlinked, and each person must find the combination of disciplines they need to practice (not the ones that are easy for them!) to grow.

Throwing Parties

Lukas said yesterday that RISE was what he expected - a party in honor of Jesus. He said something like “Parties to celebrate something aren’t usually all about the party. If I get a job and throw a party to celebrate, I don’t take the whole time telling people what my responsibilities and benefits will be; we just have a party.”

RISE was indeed a party. I had an incredibly gross wheat grass “espresso,” a guacamole-looking shot that tasted like lawn clippings. They actually cut down grass from a little tray to make it for me. Cost me a buck, but worth the experience.

It was definitely a good format for inviting non-Christians to something non-threatening and non-churchy. They showed a movie (with subtitles, since the DJs were pretty loud) called Waking Life, which some of us had seen parts of. Many points to discuss, so we may try to rent it. It’s not an explicitly Christian movie, but that fit the overall tenor of the evening. There were bands and DJs and a VJ, none of which had anything to do with the resurrection. It was a party.

The only explicitly Resurrection-focused part was the midnight communion. They did a canticle (I’m not sure of the precise word for it), telling a story like they do in Greek Orthodox churches, only in English. COTA is of a Lutheran and Episcopal flavor, so they had some people who knew how to do that sort of thing. It was cool, though not what we all expected.

rise

Right now we’re off to COTA’s RISE service for Easter.

azteca and asceticism

Right after that last post, Amy and I went out to eat at Azteca, to celebrate our tax refund. I ate way too much, and now I see why disciplines like moderation and fasting are important. Sometimes it takes doing something way wrong to help me figure out how to do it right…hopefully this will lead somewhere positive and not just be another time I ate too much.